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If you’re on a health coaching site, you’re probably interested in changing something about your body. Maybe there is something that, if altered, would make your life better in some way. Maybe you want to lose weight, get “in shape”, and/or look like the models we see on TV (or, instagram, tiktok, movies, wherever). Maybe you have been influenced by the countless impressions of a standardized beauty ideal. 

While coaching can indeed support the goals of losing weight and increasing physical activity, it is imperative to consider why these goals are important to you. That requires digging a little deeper, past the superficial (in its most literal definition, “the surface”), the exterior. 

*Consider: How will your life be better by losing weight? What will you be able to do with a thinner body that you can’t currently do? Why are those important to you?*

While I can’t deny the [evidence](https://www.niddk.nih.gov/health-information/weight-management/adult-overweight-obesity/health-risks?dkrd=/health-information/weight-management/health-risks-overweight) that overweight and obesity may contribute to several known chronic diseases and it may be in your best interest to lose weight for your health, I also can’t deny the [culture](https://books.google.com/books?hl=en&lr=&id=j-agBwAAQBAJ&oi=fnd&pg=PP6&dq=fat+shaming+and+bullying+culture&ots=L_VOYyBJLO&sig=1b-CJXxd9QrsKCCmr1d1kIiyWwA#v=onepage&q&f=false) cultivated around body-shaming, of bullying based on exterior appearances.  

My effort as a coach is to support individuals in the prevention of chronic diseases caused by *modifiable lifestyle behaviors*, that is, lifestyle choices that can be changed/altered. 

* Does eating junk food lead to an increased risk of heart disease? [Yes](https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3842860/). 
* Can you choose to eat less junk food and therefore lessen your chances of developing heart disease? Yes. 

But, shaming or fear mongering anyone into anything is not sustainable. Lasting lifestyle changes happen because an individual wants them to happen and chooses to follow through with the steps necessary to make them happen.  

It doesn’t happen overnight. Which is why it’s important to accept, love, and honor your body now, currently, as it is. 

* Your sense of self-worth isn’t dependent on what shape your body is in. 
* You are worthy of love, respect, care, attention, surviving, and thriving, simply because you exist. 
* You don’t have to prove anything to be valid. 
* You are valid now, already. 
* You are whole, now. 
* Everything you need to succeed in your individual life is contained within you. 
* You have the answers to your desires. 

Importantly, you aren’t broken. Even if you aren’t where you’d like to be, you are already whole. As well, you are resourceful, and you are capable of change, if you want to. 

While I support you on your quest, I do so with unconditional positivity and empathy, listening for the strengths that confirm your inherent abilities. 

Ultimately, your goals are yours. I have no preference what you do with your life. But if I can encourage you to love and understand yourself, I will do that. 

May you find strength in your intentions and the internal light to guide your way. 

I’m here for you if I can be.  

Nat

n@youdoyouhealth.com


References

Ahn, S., Barakat, S., Boehmer, K. R., Erwin, P.J., Murad, M. H., Prokop, L.J. (2016). Health coaching interventions for persons with chronic conditions: a systematic review and meta-analysis protocol. Systemic Reviews, 5(1). doi: 10.1186/s13643-016-0316-3

Bains, A., Rashid, M. A. (2013). Junk food and heart disease: the missing tooth. Journal of the Royal Society of Medicine. 106(12), 472-472. doi: 10.1177/0141076813512297

Farrell, Amy E. (2011). Fat Shame: Stigma and the Fat Body in American Culture. New York: NYU Press.

National Institutes of Health. (2020). Health Risks of Being Overweight. National Institute of Diabetes and Digestive and Kidney Diseases. https://www.niddk.nih.gov/health-information/weight-management/health-risks-overweight


How to Accept Yourself and Love Your Body Now

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**Goal-setting is an important part of coaching and achieving behavior change. Goals are important for clarifying desires, uncovering action steps to achieve those desires, and having a plan to stay on track. However, goals can be vague and superficial, while intentions open up a path for deep, sustainable change. Rather than doing something because you feel you have to, intentionality is a mindset shift that enables internal transformation. Let’s consider the mindsets behind goal-setting and intentionality!**

# New Year's Resolutions & The Scarcity Mindset

The start of the year always accompanies the idea of starting over, resolving past errors, and making efforts toward living healthier and happier. In theory it’s not all bad, but it’s often cloaked in toxic standards of perfection that stem from a scarcity mindset, and often sets us up for failure.  

#### New Year New Me 
The idea of a full overhaul on self can be enticing, especially if you’re in a place where you don’t feel your best. People seek coaching because they want to achieve massive transformation in their lives! Desiring transformation is not the issue, but how we go about attempting that transformation depends a lot on mentality. This idea of “new year, new me” implies that you are inherently wrong and need to be fixed – that the “old you” is not good enough.

#### Toxic Standards of Perfection 
The scarcity mindset focuses on what’s missing, what’s wrong, and what’s not enough. It can be debilitating to occupy a “negative” headspace. Perfectionism stems from scarcity – that in order for something to be good it must be perfect. However, humans are imperfect by default and the concept of “perfect” is a myth. 

# New Year’s Revolution & The Abundant Mindset 
Instead of *resolving* to be a different person, let’s *revolt* that thinking and transition into abundance! The abundant mindset confirms that there is enough for everyone, that we don’t have to be in competition with each other (or ourselves), and that we have everything we need to thrive, just by being alive. 

Instead of identifying everything that is not, wrong, or missing, the abundant mindset sees what is - what is right, what is there, what can be, still. You are enough, you are whole, and you are capable of making changes if you want to, but should not be because you feel you are not good enough as you are. The system of capitalism thrives on the scarcity mindset – guaranteeing that if you work more, buy more, conform more, that you will be successful. It completely discounts the inherent deservingness of all of us. 

### Fixed Goals vs Intentionality 
Goals and intentions are essentially the same thing – an aim toward a desired outcome. “Goals” are usually associated with a fixed end point, while “intentions” are more of a mentality, or an energetic force. Living with intention invites sustainable change while goals tend to end when they’ve been checked off the list. 

Consider how different these scenarios are, even though the desired outcome is similar.

**Setting a fixed goal sounds like:** 
* “I’ll lose 20 pounds.” 
* “I’ll go to the gym every day.” 
* “I’ll stop drinking soda.”

**Setting an intention sounds like: ** 
* “I’ll make supportive choices when deciding what to eat.” 
* “I’ll listen to my body and move in ways that feel nourishing and loving.” 
* “I intend to drink water when I want to drink soda.” 

It’s important to consider the “why” behind the goal. What are the motivations, internally and externally, for achieving this goal? By setting intentions instead of goals, other routes for achieving these goals open up and those desires can come to fruition in a variety of ways allowing the change to happen internally vs checking off external tasks. 

### Setting SMART Goals
Goal-setting is not inherently bad or wrong, either. Real, sustainable change happens with goals, but usually when goals are SMART, which are helpful to identify what exactly you’re aiming for and realistically how you can get there. 

**S**pecific

**M**easurable

**A**ttainable

**R**ealistic

**T**ime-bound 

Consider the difference between: **“I will lose 20 pounds”** and **“I will walk for 15 minutes on my lunch break three times a week”**. The first goal is specific, measurable, and technically attainable but it may not be realistic and it’s not time-bound, so there’s no definitive on when or how that weight will come off. 

What are some goals you have for transforming yourself into your best self? Do you want to move more, eat better, feel happier and healthier? What does that actually look like for you? Next time you think about setting a goal, consider the intention behind it and how you can make it a SMART goal so that you can feel confident in and connected to your desires without the shame and guilt that often accompanies a vague and externally motivated goal. 

Practice making SMART goals with this [free worksheet](https://www.canva.com/design/DAFby7M7GfA/q5NEqw0WYbg0uQ-iFltgtw/view?utm_content=DAFby7M7GfA&utm_campaign=designshare&utm_medium=link&utm_source=publishsharelink)! 

Wanna chat more about this? Let’s connect! Set up a free 30-min Cool, Confident, and Connected Discovery Session to see how we fit for coaching. 


Take care out there, 

Nat


Reframing Goals and Intentions: Why Mentality Matters in Radical Transformation

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I named my health coaching business “You Do You Health” because the philosophy of “you do you” has and continues to carry me through uncertain times, when it’s important to tap into my own unique way of thinking and problem-solving. *You know yourself best. You do you.* 

I’ve had a sense of who I am since I was at least four years old, but my confidence in representing that person has wavered as I’ve experienced, learned, adapted, and grown into myself. When I feel insecure or worried about what others think, reconnecting with the concept of “you do you” roots me in self-assurance. 

### You Do You means choosing:
* What you wear
* What you say
* How you say it
* What you eat
* How you move your body
* Who you hang out with 
* The expression of your feelings
* When to make a major life change, like moving, getting a new job, dating, or learning a new skill 
* What feels right for you
* What you want to do with your life

## How my upbringing inspired You Do You Health
My liberation to embody my own unique self is largely due to the encouragement I received growing up. I felt supported in my community to be myself, and in doing so, to question, explore, and try-on in order to see what felt right. Common phrases I heard growing up were “U B U - you be you” and “live and let live”. Individuality was encouraged from a young age, as I was supported in choosing my own clothes and personal style, what activities I wanted to participate in, and who I aspired to be. Just today, my mom reminded me of how important it is to “allow yourself to be free in what and who you are”. It’s my personal daily mission. 

My aim with You Do You Health is to inspire that philosophy and lifestyle to live confidently in your own truth, individuality, and choices. Health coaching is a vehicle for behavior change, but ultimately you are the driver. Together, we uncover your desires, goals, motivations, blocks, and available routes. Coaching is a collaborative dance between us, and between present and future selves. We’re talking about where you are now, where you’d like to be, and what ideas you have about getting there. **Together we build your individualized roadmap to what success looks like for you. **

### Health coaching emphasizes three main ideologies:
* You are the expert of you.
* You are capable of change. 
* You are resourceful in unearthing solutions to facilitate change. 

## Health coaching utilizes self-determination theory
You Do You Health (and health coaching as a field) is rooted in autonomy, which is the state of self-governing or being able to make one’s own decisions. Autonomy is a factor in self-determination theory (SDT), which considers the collaboration of extrinsic forces, intrinsic motivators, and inherent needs that influence decisions. Self-determination theory specifically highlights the societal and cultural influences that undermine an individual's sense of and enactment of free will, and ultimately their quality of life. There are countless ways society shows us how we should be. The sad irony is that each individual is exactly as unique as each other, so the pursuit of homogeny will always be fruitless! 

Alongside autonomy are *competence* and *relatedness*, which SDT deems [crucial](https://selfdeterminationtheory.org/theory/s://) to motivation, creativity, performance, and engagement, and that the diminishment or revocation of any of these three psychological needs within a social setting severely negatively impacts an individual’s well being. You are the expert of you. When that’s taken away, wellness suffers. 

*Competence* refers to one’s ability or self-efficacy. You are capable of change.  Humans don’t operate in static – we are constantly moving, adapting, and changing. You have experience changing, as you’ve done so your whole life! May this truth ground you as you navigate the uncertainty of change. 

*Relatedness* considers how we connect with and feel accepted by others. When we feel apart of a community as our true selves, we are empowered to continue to show up as ourselves, for ourselves. 

*Resourcefulness* is the ability to find solutions to problems. It can take shape in many ways, from reconsidering a pre-existing concept to digging into research to see what’s available to you. You can uncover solutions to facilitate change. 

Combined, health coaching supports an individual’s ability to make their own decisions about solutions to their own desired changes. A coach acts as a mirror to reflect you. 

## Relinquish Control of Others and Regain Control of Yourself
We live in a world that is largely out of our control. We can’t control the weather, the news, the war, the bus schedule, the certainty that the barista will correctly make our drink, or that the driver in the next lane will stick to the traffic laws. We have no control over what others do, despite our best, desperate efforts – that’s where other’s autonomy comes into play. We can choose to stay upset over something someone did or didn’t do, but we can’t make that person care, feel any way, or change. 

The only thing in our control is ourselves. The more intention we take over that, the more empowered we can feel. People are complex; everyone’s experiences are different, and we learn who we are and how to handle ourselves in our own ways in order to get along in society, jobs, life skills, and relationships. We learn to cope, rest, trust our intuition, get advice, and be okay with what *is* while pushing for what could be. 

There’s no right or wrong way to be you. When you learn yourself and how to work with yourself, you can find your own method of living your best life and feel supported by your choices. You only get one life and there’s zero chance of you becoming something you aren’t, so you might as well give it your all to being you. You’re worth it.



With love, 

Nat

The Philosophy of You Do You Health

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Health coaching is a field of support in the health and wellness network. Coaches work alongside other health professionals in a team, as well as independently. Health coaches do not diagnose, prescribe, counsel, or advise. Coaches are not therapists, doctors, exercise specialists, or nutritionists; the respective professions are those authorities. Coaching is different from other health professionals because the health coach is not the expert; coaches understand that the client is the expert of their own life. 

Under a holistic framework, coaches do not believe that individuals are broken or in need of fixing; contrarily, they understand that individuals are whole and resourceful, and that they are capable of change if they want to. Rather than: “What’s the matter with you”, coaches are curious: “What matters to you?” (ACE, 2019). Coaching uncovers values, beliefs, thought patterns, and strengths to aid and support individuals in making their own changes, when and if they want to.

Health coaching uses OARS (open-ended questions, affirmations, reflections, and summaries) to uncover individuals motivations, beliefs, desires, and barriers to change (Clifford & Curtis, 2016). Coaching is centered in client autonomy and consent, offering information and support as requested. Coaching focuses on the present moment through acceptance, and a desired future - empowering and envisioning individual goals. 

Coaches use tools such as: empathy, compassion, active listening, as well as knowledge in the field of health, to uncover what - if anything - the client wants to change. Behavior changes are more sustainable when self-initiated. Autonomous human beings don’t like to be told what to do or how to do it. Coaching encourages individuals to lead their own lives. 

Coaches are ultimately allies. As partners, collaborators, and co-creators, the coach and client together decide what the goals are and how to realistically implement changes to achieve those goals. In the same way an athletic coach does not play the game for a player, a health coach does not enact health goals for a client, the client does. 

Any change takes time. While an initial session may be inspiring, the potential of lasting change occurs with time to predict, meet, and overcome obstacles or barriers to change. Some goals might take longer than others to come into fruition. Meeting for 6 or 12 weeks allots us time to roll with those barriers and uncover new solutions. It also allows us to discuss multiple goals, should you have them. Ultimately the time spent, the energy expended, and the results seen are up to you. 



With care, 

Nat 



References

ACE. (2019). The Professional's Guide to Health and Wellness Coaching: Empower Transformation Through Lifestyle Behavior Change (J. A. Matthews, C. X. Bryant, J. S. Skinner, D. J. Green, Eds.). San Diego, CA: American Council on Exercise.

Clifford, D., & Curtis, L. (2016). The Spirit of Motivational Interviewing. In Motivational interviewing in nutrition and fitness (pp. 25-39). New York, NY: The Guilford Press.



What is Health Coaching?

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The Kickstart & Refresh Coaching Program is a highly individualized & collaborative 4-week program in which you will receive: powerful & curious questioning, a positive sounding board to ponder & reflect, pointed action steps, and personalized accountability. 

This program is for you, if you: have a specific goal in mind, need a supportive and positive push to get you going, want a personalized strategy with pointed action steps, and/or need accountability to commitment.  I look forward to working with you!

Know more about Kickstart & Refresh Coaching Program with Nat Davis

Discovery Call with Nat Davis

Now that we know where we're going, how do we get there? Together we'll develop the first steps to you achieving success.

Blast Off to Your New Life

How's it Going?

Using powerful & curious questioning, I act as a positive sounding board to ponder & reflect on the direction you want to go. What are we gonna work on for the next 4 weeks?

What's the Point?

Pointed Action Steps 

We'll check in to see how the steps are supporting your goal and what it felt like to do something different. 

Now that we've had a few weeks to take steps toward your goal, explore what it feels like to continue staying open to those new changes. 

This focused 4-week program is a kickstart into the life you want.

Kickstart & Refresh Coaching Program

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Hailing from the deserts of the Southwest, I have lived across the US — intentionally gaining experiences to better understand myself and humanity at large — and have returned to my roots to bloom in Albuquerque, NM. As a genderqueer health coach, I empower individuals to make autonomous decisions that support their own desires and goals so they can lead lives they love, today. I take a holistic approach to our relationship — understanding that each of us has our own unique wisdom to expertly lead our own lives — and will call upon your own experiences to guide our sessions and solutions. Confidently connect to your life path with less anxiety and insecurity, equipped with tools to support a happy and healthy life, no matter where you are. 

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