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A few weeks ago, I had the pleasure of speaking with Dr. Carla Pursnani about boundaries on her podcast: "Infuse Your Future with Dr. C".

Here is the link to the full episode: https://tinyurl.com/thepowerofboundaries

Boundaries play a critical role in our journey to become the leader of our life. 

Renowned shame researcher Dr. Brené Brown states: "Daring to set boundaries is about having the courage to love ourselves even when we risk disappointing others." Yes, indeed, Dr. Brown... setting boundaries is both an act of courage and an act of love. 

As I thought more about this after my time with Dr. C, I wrote the following notes in my journal.

Boundaries:
* create a path to self-respect & self-love
* help you be open to experiences & people without losing yourself
* reinforce your values and personal integrity
* create space for true authenticity to grow
* require you to be curious and vulnerable
* are not walls built to prevent negative life experiences
* are invisible until they are effectively communicated

I am curious... How have boundaries showed up in your life? 


The Power of Boundaries

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In her poem "Our Deepest Fear" Marianne Williamson writes: "Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us."
 
Ever since I was a little girl, I struggled with shining my light. I thought it was more important to keep someone else's light shining brighter than my own.
 
As an adult, that led me down a path filled with overcommitments, stress and exhaustion. I was drinking too much alcohol, eating unhealthy foods, not sleeping well, and enduring toxic relationships and environments.  
 
In the spring of 2020, it all became too much to handle. I was a powder keg giving off sparks, until one day, I finally exploded. When I looked around at the rubble of the life I had created, I didn’t recognize the person looking back at me in the mirror. I was surrounded by complete darkness and feeling utterly unwound. 
 
And then I took a deep breath. And another. Soon, a little light began to shine. My little light. While my life was still a pile of rubble, I was alive and I had a choice: continue down the path I was on or take a new path toward my light. 

I decided it was time for me to put my oxygen mask on first. Time to let go of everything that no longer served me and to connect with the source of my light and purpose. 

Determined, yet unsure where to start, I reached out to my trusted circle and asked for help.
With friends, family and mentors by my side, I took one small step, which led to another small step, and then a bigger step, until I found myself running full speed toward the light inside of me.  

Today, I have a healthier relationship with food and I am sober. The relationships with my children, friends and family are deeper and more authentic. And I also have the tremendouse privilege of helping others connect with their light so they, too, can illuminate the world.
 
What I am most proud of, though, is how deeply connected I am with the woman who looks back at me in the mirror and the comfort I find in the warmth of light that she shines so bright.

Williamson’s poem concludes with these powerful words: “As we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we’re liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

So now I ask you... are you brave enough to liberate yourself from fear and to let YOUR light shine bright? To be the lighthouse in the storm that shows the ones you love how to liberate themselves?

This Little Light of Mine

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You hear it all the time... how do I get more balance between work and life? Books, websites and other media all lead us to believe this is a reasonable goal.

I believe the struggle to find work-life balance will always be a struggle because it is a unicorn goal/expectation. A myth created to make us believe that happiness will be achieved when we finally strike the chord of balance between the two.  

Why do I believe this is an unachieveable myth? 

Work is a part of life. It isn't separate, and it shouldn't be treated as if it is. This is a very American, capitalist way of thinking. The idea that our happiness is tied up in how much we "achieve" in our careers has lead to an epidemic of burnout, loneliness, numbing out and depression. 

The truth is what happens at work, happens in all areas of our lives. If you are overcommitted and trying to prove your worth at work, then you are most likely doing that exact same thing in all areas of your life. I know firsthand because I wore that shirt most of my adult life. 

But, what if we were to stop striving for balance between work and life? What if we started treating work as just one aspect of our human experience, and not the definition of it? What if, instead of scales, we created a symphony where every area of our life (self-care, relationships, mental health, emotional health, physical health,  spiritual health, serving others, financial prosperity, etc.) played a role creating a beautiful work of art? 

What if we defined success by how authentically we showed up in all of these areas? How much creativity and joy we had in all of these areas? How much capacity for love and abundance we experienced in all of these areas?

Now, close your eyes for a moment and take a deep breath in for 5 seconds. Hold it for 5 seconds. Exhale for 7 seconds. Keep repeating this pattern and start to step into what it feels like to be fully aligned in all areas of your life. To be living in your purpose. To love yourself (flaws and all) in a way that inspires others to do the same. What do you see? What do you smell? What do you hear? What do you feel? 

That, my friends, is the symphonic sounds and feelings of who you are deep inside. Isn't it beautiful?

As the conductor of your symphony... What is one small note you can create today to move towards that harmony inside of you?

The Work-Life Balance Myth

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One day I found myself getting curious about the definition of the word transformation. When I Googled it, I found this: "a thorough or dramatic change in form or appearance; an important event like getting your driver's license, going to college, or getting married can cause a transformation in your life. A transformation is an extreme, radical change."

I took heed with this definition as I don't believe transformation is extreme or radical. I believe true transformation is a process that leads to sustainable growth and change. The examples in the definition reinforce this idea. Getting your driver's license, going to college and getting married are all results of a transformation process. 

Before you get your license, you earn your permit, take driving lessons, study vehicle codes and laws, and pass rigorous tests. When you go to college you attend classes, study, take exams, discover new areas of interest, meet new people, etc. before you receive the diploma.  Before you get married, you spend a lot of time getting to know someone, sharing your values, desires, etc. You get engaged, and you may even live with the person before actually "tying the knot". 

Each of these examples is a transformation process filled with struggles to walk through, triumphs to celebrate and everything in between. We aren't the same person when we first get behind the wheel as the person who achieves the license. We have been changed by the process of learning to drive.

With transformational coaching, the process creates a deeper understanding of who you are. It is a process of learning, re-learning, letting go, and letting in. If is a self-centered process filled with curiosity, gratitude and compassion. It is a process of putting on your oxygen mask first. It is a process of self-awareness that once begun will take you on a journey so empowering and meaningful, it will change every area of your life in the most beautiful and profound (perhaps, radical) ways. 

As human beings, transformation is inevitable. The fun happens when we decide to actively participate in the process; to embrace the experience and play. 

The choice is yours to make. What will you decide to do?

For me, John Fogerty sings the words in my heart: "Put me in coach! I'm ready to play today!" Perhaps your heart sings these words too?

Transformation Defined

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Hello! I'm Heather. I am passionate about guiding you toward more clarity so you can connect with your vision and become the powerful creator of the abundance you want. My approach is grounded in empathy and authenticity, and I create a safe and supportive space for you to explore both the power of your strengths and opportunities.  As a Master Clarity Coach and Workshop Facilitator, I am trained in a variety of techniques and methodologies, including mindfulness, meditation and breath work practices. I use these tools to help you cultivate self trust and develop true self confidence. When I'm not coaching, you can find me exploring the great outdoors, listening to live music. writing, painting, or spending time with my family. Let's unlock your power together so you can create the life you want!

During this 60 minutes session, we will explore your wants and needs, your obstacles and opportunities, as well as who I am and how I can help support you on your journey.

Who Are You and Who is Heather

A space for us to connect about what you want to experience in life.

Discovery & Connection Session

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The Clarity Catalyst course is based on a Stanford University master’s degree program that was developed to cultivate creativity, authenticity and self- expression.

In this powerful, life shifting, 10-week self-discovery course (taught live online) you will be given the blueprint to get clear on who you are and what you want. Your clarity, self-confidence, awareness, sense of direction, and passion will increase exponentially.  Each week you will meet with me for a 90-minute lesson, where you will receive soul work to explore during the week, as well as second 20-minute meeting where I will coach you through an experiential exercise to help integrate the week's core concept.  This program challenges you to let go of any pre-conceived notions you may have about creativity and the role it plays in your life. Plus it is really fun!

This first session is all about getting to know each other. I will review my background, the overall program, the materials needed, and how we will be working together to get the most of your experience. 

Session 1: Get to Know Each Other & The Program

This week, we will explore: 1) When you have faith in yourself, your creativity expands; 2) Expectations limit your faith in your creative abilities and the abilities of others; 3) Creative people let go of expectations and are open, confident to new approaches and experiences. 

Week 2: Faith in Your Creativity

This week, we will explore: 1) Judgment and its affect on our creativity; 2) The power of curiosity 

Week 3: No Judgment

This week, we will explore: 1) Staying in the present moment; 2) Listening with complete focus

Week 4: Mindfulness

This week, we will explore how the quality of your creativity is determined by the quality of your questions

Week 5: Powerful Questions

This week we will review all of the tools you have learned so far and apply them to creating a vision for your life and fulfilling your life's purpose 

Week 6: Purpose & Vision

This week, we will explore: 1) your perspective on time; 2) the causes of stress and the role we play in its creation

Week 7: Time & Stress

This week, we will explore: 1) How mindfulness deepens our personal relationships; 2) How accepting our differences can open up new possibilities in our relationships

Week 8: Relationships

This week, we will explore: 1) Your relationship with money; 2) what is true prosperity and what it means to you; 2) the three components of self-worth

Week 9: Prosperity & Self Worth

We will connect 4-6 weeks after you have completed the program to see how the tools have been integrated into your life and we will explore any areas where you may need additional support.

Week 10: Integration Check-In

Clarity Catalyst: A Courage, Creativity and Compassion Workshop

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A 12-week personalized coaching program designed to help you create boundaries and empower you to trust your intuition. 
  

Our first session together is where we get to know each other, how we will work together and we will begin to explore the areas of your life you feel have the most opportunity to support your transformation journey.

First Session: Understanding You

Each session is personalized to you and your transformation journey. There is no set formula as you as the one creating the map for our journey together. 

Sessions 2: Harnessing Your Power

Session 3: Harnessing Your Power

Session 4: Harnessing Your Power

Session 5: Harnessing Your Power

Session 6: Harnessing Your Power

Session 7: Harnessing Your Power

Session 8: Ignite Your Spark

Session 9: Ignite Your Spark

Session 10: Ignite Your Spark

Session 11: Ignite Your Spark

During this personalized session, we will take a look back at your transformation journey so we can celebrate all that you have done to ignite your spark.

Heather Everett

Areas of interest